


Love's Sacrifice

by LadyDarksbane



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: F/M, Ultimate Sacrifice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-25
Updated: 2015-12-25
Packaged: 2018-05-09 05:16:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5526803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyDarksbane/pseuds/LadyDarksbane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A retelling of the Warden's funeral at Redcliffe. </p><p>Vala Tabris gave her life to stop the Blight, but she left the man she loved behind to rule his Kingdom.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love's Sacrifice

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: This is an F!Tabris/Alistair pairing. Sorry this one doesn’t have a happy ending.
> 
> I found this little gem buried in an old stories folder. Decided to post it. It made me cry rereading it, but I'm a hopeless sap, still have a tissue handy.

_~Hello my friend/We meet again/It's been a while/Where should we begin?_  
_Feels like forever/Within my heart/Are memories/Of perfect love that_  
_You gave to me/Oh, I remember/When you are with me/I'm free, I'm careless_  
_I believe/Above all the others/We'll fly/This brings tears/To my eyes_  
_My sacrifice~_

The King of Ferelden stoically stood before the small crowd gathered in Redcliffe village. On the surface, he was everything that a King should be…noble, heroic and steadfast in his determination to see his land recover from the Blight which had nearly destroyed everything he held dear. Yet those who truly knew him knew that on the inside Alistair was anything but what he appeared to be. Grief, anger and regret had set in once more one hundredfold worse than what he had endured when he lost Duncan. It was a black cloud hanging over him. There would be a time and a place to grieve for the one he loved more than anything. The King knew that, even if Alistair refused to comply. The King of Ferelden would stand strong, carrying out his duty as he knew he must.

This day his duty was the memorial service for the one who had done so much, sacrificing everything she was to stop the Blight…the one who had so valiantly lead the charge against the darkspawn siege of Denerim. The same woman who had ignored his heartfelt plea, bashing him in the head after tricking him with one last kiss…but oh what a kiss it had been…making it impossible for Alistair to do the right thing by sacrificing himself.  
Alistair gazed down upon her in gentle repose. It was almost as if she were sleeping. He almost expected her to wake up at any time now, but that was not to be. He then cleared the lump that had formed in his throat, noticing the nod Eamon had given him. The memorial was about to begin. His heart broke anew, knowing this would be the last he ever saw of her.

“My friends, we are gathered here to pay our respects to Vala Tabris, the Grey Warden that saved us all. She gave her life to destroy the Blight, a sacrifice we must never forget. It was no accident that she was there, either. She was special, and each of us has had our life touched by her in some way. I... I thought we would be together forever. There isn’t another man alive who loved her the way I do, the way I always will. She put me on this throne, and showed me how important it was I be here, despite my protests. But there was no telling her no, right? She didn't choose to be a Grey Warden, but she still went to her death willingly. The Grey Wardens couldn't have asked for anyone finer. How do you properly honor someone like that? The Grey Wardens are building a magnificent tomb at Weisshaupt, right next to Garahel's, but I'd like to do something as well. Cyrion, please step forward.”

The assembled crowd watched as a dark haired elf came to stand before King Alistair. His craggy face showed deep lines of grief while his blood-shot and swollen eyes were a clear testament to the tears he’d shed for his fallen daughter. 

“You are Vala's father, are you not? We had some difficulty finding you,” Alistair remarked, meeting the eyes of the man standing on the other side of the stone sarcophagus that Vala rested upon.

Cyrion sighed heavily, “Things in the Alienage are chaotic. Help has been... slow to arrive.” How could this human king know how bad things were for his elven subjects? Yet Cyrion knew this was not the time to open that can of worms. 

“I'd like to change that. The Alienage will have its own ruler, who speaks in the Landsmeet as an equal. I'd like that to be you… the first bann of the Alienage, if you're willing.” 

Cyrion’s hand flew to his chest. He could barely believe what he’d just heard. “My lord, I... don't know what to say!”

Alistair gave a small smile. “I wish your daughter were still here to fill the role herself. As it is, it's just a start. I promise you that.” Reaching down to his feet, Alistair retrieved a worn leather pack. “This will also help. Inside are your daughter’s worldly belongings, including a small fortune she amassed during our journeys in the last year. I know she would want her people to have it. She often gave all she could to help the less fortunate.”

Cyrion accepted Alistair’s offering graciously. “When Vala returned to the Alienage after being gone for that year, I said some harsh things to her…things I wish I could take back. It’s been hard to forgive her for her actions. She left Shianni to suffer at the hands of Vaughan Urien, knowing full well what that man would do to her. The offer of forty sovereigns was more important than her family. To top it all off, when she was conscripted into the Grey Wardens, she let Soris pay for her crimes. I told her she wasn’t welcome in my home, that she was no longer my daughter, even after she’d saved me and many others from slavers. I was still angry with her because she seemed to show no regret for her actions. Those were my last words to my daughter and now here she lies. I’ll never be able to say I’m sorry or tell her just how proud that I am of her. She was so very much like her mother.”

Alistair knew the man before him grieved for Vala as much as he. “I spent nearly every day of the last year with your daughter. Let me tell you that she very much regretted her actions, despite the fact that she didn’t show it outwardly. There were many nights she cried on my shoulder. She was terribly heartbroken after the last time she saw you in the Alienage, after she rescued you from the slavers. She knew she wouldn’t be receiving a grand homecoming; that tore her heart out. She said she would never be able to make up for what she did, but she hoped her family knew she loved you all very much.”

Cyrion wiped the tears away, returning to the place of honor he’d been granted. 

“Let all know that the Arling of Amaranthine, once the land of Arl Howe, is now granted to the Grey Wardens. There they can rebuild, and hopefully live up to this example. Friends, let us hope that she has gone on to a better place and that she knows just how thankful we are for what she has done here.” Alistair carefully laid the rose he’d given her, which had been so beautifully preserved by Wynne all those long months ago upon her chest. “You will be missed. More than I can possibly say. Whatever better place you have gone onto, I hope you will always remember how much I love you.”

Zevran walked up to Alistair, standing before Vala’s sarcophagus. “Our dear Warden bade me to give this to you when the time was right. It was her wish that her words be read aloud for all to hear.” 

Alistair accepted the letter from Zevran, cocking an eyebrow at the Antivan elf. Why had Vala entrusted Zevran with something so important? He nodded at Zevran before opening the letter. His troubled thoughts floated back to the eve of the great battle, to Morrigan’s dark offer and his refusal of it. He wished to spend that night with Vala instead, knowing it would most likely be the last. What a wonderful night it had been…she had given her all to him. Looking back it was if she knew what she was going to do. He glanced down at the letter, frowning. When had she had time to write it? They’d spent that entire night together, entwined in each others arms. Somehow his tricky little minx must’ve wiggled her way out of his arms long enough to pen this missive. 

_“Gentle raging lover,_  
_Weep no more._  
_You have my heart,_  
_We share a common soul._  
_Know that you are not alone;_  
_Our hearts shall keep us warm._  
_Sweet and lovely dream,_  
_Tarry yet awhile._  
_Let my arms enfold you,_  
_Let my soul keep you warm.”_

A blush washed over Alistair’s cheeks as he read from the letter. He couldn’t bear to look up at the faces of those gathered around him, despite the fact that everyone knew of his relationship with Vala. Even Anora knew, having asked them both to keep it discreet. 

_My heart sails upon a sea of blackness. The tide is tumultuous as are my thoughts. I can scarcely stand to think of what tomorrow will bring, but I can’t bear the thought of letting you risk everything we’ve fought so hard for. It breaks my heart knowing what I must do. I love you and I will never forget you. Every minute of every day we’ve spent together I have cherished. Growing up as I did, living in the shadows of the shems who treated my people so abhorrently, had colored my views of all shemlen men. But you broke through those walls, proving to me just how skewed my views were. It made me love you all the more. Don’t cry for me, my love. Don’t let my sacrifice build a wall around your heart. You have a bright future ahead of you as king and a beautiful woman to rule beside you as queen. Don’t let your grief blind you to the bright future you could have. And if by chance you have a daughter, name her after me. There’s so much more I’d love to say to you, but those words would be inappropriate for this letter. That is why you shall find a second one for your eyes only in our special place._

Tears slid unchecked down Alistair’s face. Part of him wanted to run all the way up to the castle to find her other letter. He knew he couldn’t leave the memorial service yet. So he focused his bleary eyes back on her words. 

_To Zevran, to the best friend a girl could have. I know as much as you chased me you wanted more from me than just friendship, and if I could have given it, I would have. I think you and I were far too much alike for our own good. But you know this, yet I have to admit that I could have loved you if I’d never met Alistair. When you came into my life, I was surrounded by shems and one very stern qunari. It was refreshing to have a fellow elf around, despite the fact you were hired to kill any surviving Grey Wardens. No one understood why I spared you. I needed a connection to what I’d left behind, no matter how trivial. And in a very special way, I love you dearly._

_To Leliana, my beautiful bard friend, the one who kept me sane through it all and made me laugh with all your stories. I have long envied your beauty and your voice. You are so vivacious and so special. I never thought I ever would’ve stood a chance with Alistair with you around. You knew my fears. You consoled me and encouraged me, helping me through the worst of my heartbreak of what I’d done before I became a Grey Warden. You helped me be able to confess it all to Alistair. You were there when I needed a friend. I only hope I was able to give back to you what you gave to me. The sunset and the stars will never be the same for me because of you, my friend._

_To Wynne, my advisor and mentor…I could always count on you to be there when I needed you. You became the mother I’d lost so long ago. You were ever the voice of rhyme and reason when I could make no sense of anything. Your gems of wisdom saw me through so many tough decisions. I will never forget you, my surrogate mother._

_To Oghren, when we first met, I wanted to throttle you as hard as I could for your insults and belligerence, but I soon learned there was no one else I’d rather have at my back. You are heart and soul larger than life and have been a pleasure to know. I never would’ve thought so thinking back to that moment in Orzammar at the entrance to the Deep Roads. I’ve never met another who puts his all into everything he does. In battle, you are a scary monster, but I’ve seen you around children or animals, and it’s those moments that see you change into the big hearted dwarf you really are. Don’t ever change and remember to be good to Felsi. If you aren’t I may have to come back from the dead and kick your sodding dwarven arse._

_To Sten, kadan, words cannot begin to express the depth of respect and friendship I have for you. When I rescued you from that cage in Lothering, I never knew I’d stumbled onto my greatest ally as well as greatest trial. Our views were so different. I could scarcely grasp the concepts you presented to me…of women not fighting, of people not being happy in their place in society, of how the qunari function as a people. It was all foreign to me, yet the more I listened to you, the more I came to realize, we wanted the same thing. You told me once that it was unheard of for a female to have her own beresaad, so I say to you, my friend that I am a better person for it and I can only hope I’ve made you proud of me._

A single solitary tear dropped from Sten’s violet eyes, sliding down his angular cheek to fall onto his brightly polished silver armor. The Qunari had worn his best to this service, in respect to the only person outside of his own people that he held in high esteem.

_To my father, I cannot tell you how shamed I am, how undeserving of being your daughter for the things I’ve done. I knew it was wrong when I did it. I was bitter and angry because that pig of a shemlen lord chose to take the other girls first when I’d offered myself instead. I know that’s no reason to allow Shianni to suffer. I’ve regretted it every moment since. It was my fault, my doing. Shianni and Soris, especially Soris, shouldn’t have paid for my actions. I’ve tried my hardest to be a better person. I can’t say I blame you for the things you said to me. I am undeserving of being your daughter. I had no right to think I could stroll back into the Alienage as if nothing had happened and expect you to welcome me with open arms. Through it all I never forgot where I came from. I love you, father, with all my heart. I love you, Shianni and Soris, and though I can never make up for the pain I’ve caused, I hope someday you find it in your heart to forgive me. Walk well and be at peace._

_My heart, my love, goes out to all of you._

_Vala_

Alistair looked up at the crowd surrounding him, realizing there wasn’t a single dry eye to be found. He brushed his tears away and welcomed Leliana into his arms as she rushed forward to embrace him. The Orlesian bard nestled her head in the crook of Alistair’s neck, crying large sobby tears that wet the golden breastplate of his armor. He soothed her, stroking her back tenderly. “Let it go, Leliana,” he whispered. 

Leliana pulled away from Alistair, facing her best friend. “Words and tales have long been my life, but as I stand here on the precipice, I can find no words to express how I feel. Vala was so special to me. She accepted me for who I am, despite my past. We spent many a night huddled together under a blanket. I would talk and she would mostly listen. I knew her fears, her hopes, and her dreams of a life with Alistair. I often reassured her that it was not he that my interest lie in, that my interest lie in her. She accepted my admission and did not judge me for it. She was beautiful, giving and extraordinary. I have composed a ballad in her honor that I shall play at the end of the service.” With a hiccup, Leliana leaned forward, placing a kiss on Vala’s cold forehead, then she whispered, “I will never forget you, my friend and I will always love you.”

Alistair cleared his throat, “If anyone else wishes to say a few words…” He motioned to spot he had vacated as he moved to stand beside Anora. This time when he took hold of the queen’s hand, caressing it in his much larger one, she did not refuse. 

Oghren rubbed his red bulbous dwarven nose as he walked up to the sarcophagi with Felsi in tow. The dwarven berserker and his lady love both laid pink sweetheart roses upon the fallen elf’s chest. “I never knew what real sodding honor was before I met Vala. Back in Orzammar, I was drowning in buckets of ale and self-pity, but she came along and took me away from all that. As we stood at the city gates of Denerim, she told me what an honor it had been to fight beside me. I told her that no one had looked at me and saw honor in a long, long time. She took a drunken disgrace of an Orzammar warrior and gave me a reason to keep going. She helped me get past Branka so I could find love again. Vala, I have never had a friend like you and it is my honor to let you know that if my Felsi has a girl, we will name her after you. You are the one who made it possible for me and Felsi to be together again. For that we will never sodding forget you.”

Following Oghren and Felsi was Zevran. His mischievous green eyes sparkled as he attached a lone golden earring to a buckle on her black and silver armor. “Ah, what can I say to you, you saucy little minx. You protected me when you by rights should have killed me. You gave me a chance that no one else would have. Yes, I chased you. What a merry chase it was, but I knew where your heart lie. I shall never forget you, my dear Vala. May we meet again in another lifetime.” 

Alistair watched in reverence as Sten walked up Vala’s resting place, kneeling before her. Silently the qunari said a few words then placed a small iconic totem she’d gifted the him onto her body. “Farewell, kadan,” he spoke before walking away. The qunari didn’t look back as he took his leave of Redcliffe. It was time for him to start his journey home. 

Anora stepped away from Alistair, gracefully walking over to the stone sarcophagus. “When I met Vala, she and I scarcely trusted each other. I was the daughter of the man who’d harrowed her order, killed our king and slandered her every action. Yet what I saw in her was a powerful woman who was a force to be reckoned with. I asked her to side with me against the very man she’d been traveling with ever since Ostagar. When she agreed, I fully expected her to betray me yet she did not. She held up her end of the bargain, going as far as convince me to marry the man she loved. Her selflessness gave me new hope. I grew up around heroes, spent most of my life in the shadow of a living legend, but Vala is much more than that. I will never forget what she’s done for me, what she’s done for all of us.” The Queen laid a white rose next to the others before she rejoined Alistair. 

He cracked a small smile at Eamon and Teagan when they both spoke. He teared up anew as Bann Sighard and his son, Oswyn stepped forward to say their piece. Countless others cycled through, paying their final respects to Vala, the Hero of Ferelden. It warmed Alistair’s heart that Vala had touched so many lives, that so many spoke so fondly of her. 

Lastly, he made way for Leliana once more and the lovely but haunting ballad she’d composed in Vala’s honor. As Alistair listened to Leliana sing, he glanced up at the castle. He couldn’t wait to get away, couldn’t wait to find the letter she’d left solely for him. He knew he’d treasure it forever, just as he would always treasure her.

 

~~~


End file.
